A Search

My heart bleeds for the pains it has felt
My share of drama that I’ve been dealt
And still I search for new love
No matter how hard I say I’m not trying
My head spins from the tears that I’ve shed
My suffering and longing
And still I search for new love
I am young, not quite old enough
To say it’s enough
Don’t trample my heart
Let’s just restart
I want you tall, dark and handsome
Was in the boxes I was checking
And now erase the memories
Of me crying and falling to my knees
Another relationship on the rocks
Another stomach in knots
Because fairytales do end and more drama begins
And there you standing in front of me
Holding my hand
Saying things that are just comforting
And still I search for new love
Why don’t they love me?
All the boys and men
I search for an open hand and still I grasp onto nothing, anything but short from everything
I wonder and ponder and shout and scream
I whimper and gasp for the aches that I feel
And still I search for new love
There you were looking at me, staring at me, longing to hold me
Love did not forget not once about me
Miscommunication was what it really was.
While I searched for new love, you were searching for me
-N.Kisses*